- The domestication of one’s emotions is perhaps one of the hardest challenges imposed on humanity. Unlike any other challenge, the obstacle is nothing other than oneself. At least a part of it. To become less emotional, one has to tolerate the discomfort that comes from not giving in to what the irrational voices within say or urge one to do. Control comes from mastering the discomfort of trying to control the seemingly uncontrollable.
- One way to gain control of one’s emotions, is by exposing oneself to that which causes emotions to awaken, and logic to fall into a temporary, and yet seemingly unresponsive slumber. To become less emotional, you need to go from fear to control, and not just in any particular case, but also in general. Because what makes you emotional, is not just emotions for the sake of emotions, but an attempt at gaining back control when control is lost. And some of us, just don’t know how to go about it. So they lean back on adrenaline and dopamine-fueled behaviors that seem uncontrollable or irrational from the outside looking in, but that make perfect sense when you finally manage to experience exactly what it feels like to be in their shoes, wear their clothes, and see things from their perspective. Essentially, when you can finally manage to experience what it feels like to be them…To gain control over one’s emotions is to know what it feels like to be your uncontrollable you, and to know what it feels like to be the opposite while having the strength of will to always choose the latter. Even when the former is more appealing.
- On the way to a more emotionally balanced life, the deprivation from the balance that comes from being in one’s comfort zone will be the very thing that brings true emotional balance to your life, as now, there is no need to worry about the next time an outburst will occur. You’re in control, even over the uncontrollable parts of you.
- The belief that one cannot control one’s emotions is the kind of self-fulfilling prophecy with the power to not only change the following five minutes but to rewrite one’s entire destiny. The first step to control is to believe you can be in control in the first place and this is one of the many beauties of the mind.
- Health. Health. Health. Never take it for granted. The degree to which you find yourself on edge or out of control is often correlated with your current health status. The brain is an energy hog, said Steven Kotler once. And energy is limited. So is it any surprise that being undernourished in any way might contribute to you going off the rails? If nothing else works on your attempts at gaining control over your emotions, it might just be the time to look through your health, as when the body gives in, so does the body. Control is an emergent property of stability.
It is all about knowledge and experience 😉
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