In this post, we’ll have a discussion on simple life ideas no one talks about.
Life just like the human-animal is complex on its own merit. Thousands and thousands of books have been written about it, songs composed and lectures given, and still up to the day of this writing there hardly is a single and concise definition of what it is, or what it might be all about. This doesn’t mean that the whole of it is a mystery. Just like an unpredictable artist who once in a while it reveals a little of itself while keeping its mystery, life too gives us a glimpse of itself but in a way that it’s either to clear to pick up even for the clear-minded or too painful to accept even for the thickest of the thick-skinned. This post is a blend of both worlds, and hopefully, you’ll finish the reading with a clearer perspective of this thing we call LIFE.
Simple life ideas no one talks about
As the title describes it these ideas are simple and for one reason or another we don’t bring them up as much as we should. What it’s easy for us is to rehash old sweet-sounding ideas repetitively, each time feeling like we’re breaking new ground. The truth is that we’re all aware of this on some level, but you know how the human mind is. It’s wise enough to know the truth without knowing, but also creative and relentless enough to hide it from itself.
1.Not Everything matters
The first and likely to be unpopular life fact is that in life not everything matters. In fact, most things don’t even matter when putting to perspective the droplet of time a human life is. And yet most of us act as if everything is the most important thing in the world. We live in a time in which social norms/standards are literally made overnight, and before we can tell something even happened we find ourselves living by different rules. When yesterday you could say whatever you wanted without feelings of fear for your career, today even the self-entitled “I don’t care what people think of me” people have to watch over their shoulders before they open their mouths.
This is good and all, but as you know, with every good comes some bit of evil and vice-versa. The speed with which information travels makes the easily impressed/influenced lose their sense of direction. I’m talking about the kind of people who follow the crowd. I’m talking about most of us. Who 50 years ago would live conservative lives not because they themselves are conservative people but because being conservative was the norm. In the past change would happen very slowly, just like the way it does in large organizations that have been around for decades.
Now the kind of social change that would require years can come and go in a matter of months if not days. All of a sudden everybody is passionate about this cause, and in no time everybody forgets that the issue is still there. It never went anywhere. Just your mind did. Just like a helpless seducer, it found itself chasing something new because what once was exciting is now old and boring. Even as retains its importance and urgency. Not everything matters people! I know It might sound cynical but once you accept this truth and apply it to your life real change can happen. When you only allow yourself to worry and stress about a select of very few thoughts about things you can put/give more of you to those things. This leads us to the question of: “What really matters for you?” Is it money? Relationships? And an even more important question is: “why?” Is it because someone told you the things that matter for you matter? Or does it come from a deep place from within you that might not be completely understood by you yourself, but whose fundamental insights in the subject of “you” tend to be accurate?
The problem with this attitude to life begins when you first voice it out to other people. This is why trying it out first for yourself and seeing the benefits that come from it is perhaps the best. The reason for this is that people are very good at putting their values, goals, and dreams onto us. This need comes from an even deeper need to influence other people. To see them taking our advice and to be able to tell other people that we were the cause of so and so’s change in behavior. We want to be smart so some of us will go to the extent of hurting someone through bad advice just to feel good about ourselves. Anything new, especially if opposed to our beliefs is not welcomed, simply because we tend to attach our identity to our beliefs. We become what we believe in. Many believe that everything matters because if it doesn’t chances are that they don’t matter. And that my friends, just like a life without an afterlife whether true or not is an unbearable thing to imagine.
So what really matters? The answer is simply whatever matters to you and you alone, and you can only really know what this thing/set of things is/are by spending some time alone. By quieting the voices of the many people that whisper within you while giving the fake impression that the values you have come from your own self, just because the voices you hear come from your own head. Not all voices are yours even when they sound like yours or come from within that thing you call your brain.
2. Not everybody matters
Still on the same vein is the idea that only a select few can realistically matter to most of us. We live in a time in which being social has been overblown. Just like groups that have been oppressed, instead of a correction, as the comedian Bill Burr often says, there was an overcorrection, in which the oppressed become oppressors and the only reason why they don’t get the title is because now they have control over perhaps what one would call the most powerful weapon that ever existed, and that is dialog. When you control the labels you can make nothing out of something, and just as easily something turn into nothing. The point is that even that which we consider good can turn bad when overdone, and one of these things is the idea, or to be more accurate the silent idea that one’s happiness is directly proportional to the number of friends one has. So we silently try to become that person who is able to develop deep relationships with every soul that crosses our path, even if we’ll never see them again. So the ones with fewer and deeper relationships can easily feel as if what they have is not enough, ignoring on the process the fact that they might have something priceless at hand. and just like the child that hasn’t felt yet the burdens of adulthood, that same person unknowingly prays for silver when they already have gold, simply because the world told them that silver is to the gold they have what the gold they have is to the silver they now want.
Not everybody matters and one should not seek to be best friends with everybody. Be overjoyed when you find that one person, or that one group who/in which you and them feel the closeness the hand feels when it slips inside a custom made glove. When there is no room for interpretation, or even the need to pretend anything for anyone. It just is. I like to compare the power of a great relationship with the effect that a career path that suits a person has on the way they spend their time. For both time is always at a deficit. Moments and hours are indistinguishable from one another, and for each, the mind’s solely purpose is to slow time down, which fails miserably until it has to settle for less of that it is the attitude of just enjoying the moment while it lasts. Can that be even defined as settling for less?
The point is that relationships are perhaps one of the best areas to apply the old wisdom of “it’s not about quantity. It’s about quality.”
3. There is such a thing as wisdom from within
The third point is that in life it pays to understand oneself. We tend to put emphasis on the kind of person who goes their own way and never follows the pack. Some of us are completely against this approach to life, and their appreciation of well-established rules and procedures to do things is often looked down upon.
One thing I learned about human beings is that they are vastly more complicated than they look. The moment we try to place them in neat little boxes of definitions the more prone to mistakes we are. Just think about introversion and extraversion for example. Can you place yourself/anyone in one or the other completely? Chances are that no. So no wonder problems quickly arise when that moment comes in which the wisdom of the masses fail us and we feel emptier than ever before. The truth is that life is a game in which most have no clue about the rules and very few if any have only a vague idea. But most of us, however, can’t help but follow others like us who, for whatever reason managed to convince us that they know the way in a journey they themselves are taking for the first time.
The point is that life is complicated and blindly following the pack or blindly ignoring it can be a source of great pain and unhappiness. You need to get to really know yourself to be able to even get a shot at happiness and that takes time. From within the truth about yourself comes to life, not because the inner you is mystical or anything, but because we’re all the main character in the story of our lives, and it’s impossible to get a main character perspective in a plot in which you’re nothing more than an extra. The point is that through introspection you often get to know more about yourself than you would from someone else’s point of view simply because only you can really know what it feels like to be you. Only you can really know what “I” means.
It is all about knowledge and experience 😉
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